


With Deepest Appreciation and Gratitude

by clgfanfic



Category: Riptide (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-02
Updated: 2012-11-02
Packaged: 2017-11-17 13:54:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/552271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clgfanfic/pseuds/clgfanfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A sequel to "Prisoner of War"</p>
            </blockquote>





	With Deepest Appreciation and Gratitude

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published in the zine The Eyes Have It #8 and later in Boss and Bodacious #2 under the pen name Lynn Gill.
> 
> This story is a mix of fact and fiction. I have tried to keep the facts correct with respect to details about the Vietnam Women's Memorial, but the speech at the dedication is strictly a creation of fiction. I relied heavily on an article by Sally Eauclaire, "Sculpting a Vision," in Vietnam (Vol 6, No 4) December 1993, for the details found here.

Nick and Cody sat in the _Riptide_ 's salon, listening as Murray explained in painstaking detail the latest retirement investments he'd made on their behalf.

"Sounds fine to me," Cody said as he stood and walked over to pour himself another cup of coffee.

"Bring me one, too," Nick called after him.

"Sure."

"We're on schedule to retire from the detective business, quite comfortably I might add, in seven years," Murray said with a proud smile.  "A pretty boss and bodacious prospect, in my opinion."

Cody carried the two cups of coffee back, setting one in front of Nick.  "Not soon enough for me," he said.  "2001 sounds like forever."

Nick grinned.  "Yep, you have to get past 1997 and the big 5-0 first."

"Hey," Cody replied defensively.  "Turning fifty is… important."

"It's _old_ ," the dark-haired detective countered.

"Old, hell, you're only four years younger than I am.  You'll get there soon enough."

Murray grinned.  It was an old and familiar argument.  They were getting older, but they were still in great shape and enjoying the agency.  Not that they couldn't retire now, their investments and positions in Baxter Industries had yielded a very comfortable nest-egg for them, but the work still called and as long as they were healthy and able, he knew the Riptide Detective Agency would continue to operate right up to the eve of the 21st century.

But, he acknowledged, they weren't getting any younger.  1993 would see Cody turn forty-six and Nick forty-two.  He smiled inwardly.  He'd finally reached the big 4-0.  Their forties – another decade of life, another step in the ladder of life's transitions, another–

"Hello.  Hello?"

"Wonder who that is," Cody said, sliding off the seat and crossing to the salon windows.

"We're not expecting any clients today, are we?" Nick asked.  "I thought we were going fishing."

Murray shook his head.  "No one's–"

"Hey, Nick, come here, you're not going to believe this," Cody said, grinning over his shoulder.

Nick pushed himself off the bench seat.  "Better not be that lady Klingon who wanted us to find a way to send her back to the home-world," he muttered, walking over to join Cody.  Glancing out the window, his eyes rounded.  "Peggy?"  He stepped to the sliding door and opened it.  "Peggy?" he called.

"Nick?"

The dark-haired detective laughed and smiled.  "Peggy, this is great!  Come on!" He waved her onto the boat.  "Come aboard."

She stepped carefully over the railing, thankful she was wearing pants, and joined him.

Nick welcomed her with a warm bearhug.  "It's great to see you," he said.  "You look great." 

"Thanks," she replied, grinning at him.  "You look pretty good yourself."  She glanced over his shoulder.  "Hi Cody, Murray."

"Hi yourself," Cody said, stepping out and getting a hug of his own.  "How are you?"

"Good, I'm really good."  She met Nick's gaze.  "Um, Nick–"  She broke off, shifting her gaze to Cody and Murray.  "Would you two mind if I borrowed Nick for a little while?"

"Us?  Mind?" Cody teased with a grin.  "Please, get him out of here for a while; you'll be doing us a favor."

"We'll see you guys later," Nick said, taking her hand and helping her back over the rail before leading the way down to the surf.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

The pair walked along the beach, a light breeze just strong enough to lift Peggy's still blonde hair, allowing it to dance alluringly around her face.

"You really do look great," Nick said, his emotions churning.

"Thank you," she returned with a smile, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear.  "I can't believe you're all still detectives, but it certainly looks like it agrees with you."

Nick nodded and grinned.  "Yeah, I guess it does.  Cody's made us promise we'll all retire in '97."

"'97?"

Nick dropped his voice.  "When he hits fifty, but don't tell him I told you.  I'm holding out for 2000."

"Ah," she replied knowingly.  "I'll keep that strictly confidential."

Nick cocked his head slightly and asked, "Peggy, why are you here?"

"You mean why after nine years of just Christmas cards do I show up on your doorstep?"

"Yeah," he said.  "You aren't in trouble, are you?"

"No."  She stopped and sat down on the sand, Nick sitting next to her.  Staring out at the breaking surf, she said, "I came to ask you something, a favor, well, all three of you, actually."  She looked at Nick.  "But I want to wait until we're back at the _Riptide_."

"Okay," Nick said, realizing that he still had strong feelings for the woman.  "I can wait.  But tell me about you.  What've you been doing?"

She smiled.  "Well, going home wasn't as easy as I'd hoped, but I stuck it out."

"Good," Nick encouraged.

Wrapping her arms around her knees, she watched the gulls hovering and gliding above the small waves.  "Let's see, the _Reader's Digest_ version of 'this is your life'.  Uh, when I left here nine years ago I went home.  My parents were thrilled to have me… for about six months."  She grinned at him.  "I was still pretty confused, but, there was this amazing woman at the local Vet Center.  She convinced me to come in and meet the group there.  Men and women, nurses, like me…  It was hard at first, but then the dam broke."  She laughed softly and shook her head, emotion filling her voice as she continued.  "I started talking, and talking, and talking.  They couldn't shut me up for a while."

"Did it help?" he asked, hoping that she'd been able to lay her ghosts to rest.

"Yes, it has," she assured him.  "It took me about a year, but I started to put things in perspective.  Oh, sometimes I still have nightmares, and the PTSD is still there, but now I feel like I'm in charge again.  It's something I can deal with."

He moved closer, then reached out and slipped an arm around her shoulders and gave her a squeeze.  "That's good.  Really good."

She nodded.  "I eventually opened my own travel agency.  My parents said get a job, or else, and I'm doing pretty good.  I'm not going to get rich, but it's a good life."

"Any… relationships?" Nick ventured, mentally crossing his fingers for luck.

"A few along the way," she admitted, not able to meet his gaze.  "But that ended when I met Bill."

"Uh oh," Nick said, feeling his stomach drop.  "Sounds like my chances are over."

"I'm afraid so," she admitted, reaching up to pat his arm, which was still resting across her shoulders.  "I wanted to tell you, but I couldn't find the right words."  She glanced up, meeting his blue eyes.  "I feel terrible."

"Don't," he ordered.  "I'm just happy you're happy.  You _are_ happy, right?"

She nodded.

"Tell me about him."

"Well," she said, leaning into his embrace.  "Let's see, I met him at the Center.  He's a vet, a psychologist.  He's taken over the counseling service."

"That's convenient," Nick muttered.

She giggled.  "You're jealous, Nick Ryder."

"I am not.  I just want to be sure he deserves you."

"We dated for about a year, on and off, and then he just up and proposed."

"And?"

"And I said yes," she replied, sounding a little surprised about it herself.  "We've been married a little more than two years now."

"I'm happy for you," Nick said truthfully.

"Thank you, Nick.  You're so sweet."

"Any kids?" he asked, embarrassed.

She smiled.  "Just one.  We adopted a little girl last year."

Nick shook his head.  "That's really great."

"What about you, any ladies in your life?"

He shook his head.  "You know how it is.  Work, the guys, work… doesn't leave a lot of time for marriage."

"Not even a regular lady?"

"Nope."

"Nick Ryder, some lucky lady is out there waiting for you."

He stood and extended his hand, helping her to her feet.  "If that's true," he replied, then leaned in closer to her and  added, "and I'm not saying that I believe it, you understand, but then she's got to wait until '97, or 2000."

Peggy giggled.  "You're impossible."

"I know," Nick admitted.  "Now, come on, let's go tell Cody and Murray why you're here."

"Okay," she said, taking his hand and following him back to the _Riptide_.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Sitting in the salon the three detectives waited as Peggy took a deep breath and said, "The reason I came is to ask the three of you to come with me to Washington DC."

"Washington?" Cody echoed.

"Have you heard about the Vietnam Women's Memorial?" she asked.

Murray nodded.  "Yes, I remember seeing something about it on-line."

"The unveiling's next month, over the Veterans' Day weekend," she explained.  "And I wanted you to be there with me."

"Why?" Cody asked.

"Why us, instead of your husband?  Or will he be there, too?" Nick asked.  Cody gave him a surprised look, but he ignored it.

She smiled.  "No, he can't make it.  And it's because if it hadn't been for you guys, I wouldn't have the life I have now.  I owe you all so much… you saved my life.  It would mean a lot to me if you'd go.  Please?"

The three exchanged glances.  Nick nodded first.  "We'll go."

"Sure," Cody added.  "We'd be honored to."

"Yes, we'd be _very_ honored to accompany you," Murray assured her.  "I think it's a boss and bodacious idea."

She stood and gave each man a hug.  "Thank you, really.  This means more to me than I can say."

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

In Washington D.C., Nick, Cody and Murray made their way through the crowds, trying to maneuver closer to the curb.  In the distance they could hear the approaching parade.

"Isn't this exciting?" Murray asked his companions, then laughed.

"Yeah, Murray," Nick replied with a grin.  "It is."

Cody just looked amused as they watched the younger man straining to catch a glimpse of the approaching parade.

"Remember when we were here in 1984?" Nick asked his best friend.

Cody nodded.  "I'll never forget it."

"Oh, excuse me," a young woman said, reaching out to help steady Cody after she plowed into him.

"No problem," he said, smiling down at the attractive blonde.

"I was just trying to get close enough to get a picture of my mom."

"Your mom?" Cody asked, suddenly feeling every one of his forty-five years.

"Yeah, she's marching in the parade."

"Is she a veteran?" Murray asked.

"Yeah," the girl said, pride clear in her eyes.  "She was a nurse over there in 1969 and 70."

"Wow," Murray said.  "Well, you can come up here," he offered, helping her step forward to the curb where she could get a clear shot of the parade as it passed.

"Is this your mom's first time in a parade?" Murray asked.

The young woman smiled up at him.  "Uh-huh, and did you know that this is the first parade led by women military and civilian veterans of the Vietnam era?  My mom was really thrilled to be a part of it."

"Here they come!" Cody said, pointing.

The detectives and the young woman watched and cheered as the rows of women passed by, smiling and waving at the crowd.

"There's Peggy!" Nick said, then yelled, waving, "Peggy!  Hey, Peggy!"

She looked over and caught sight of the threesome, then waved back.  Tears were running freely down her cheeks, but she looked happy.

The young woman snapped several pictures of Peggy, and then waved frantically.  "Hi, Mom!"

A pretty, dark-haired women smiled and waved back as the girl snapped off several more shots.  After the women were past, the girl turned back to the detectives.  "Thanks!  That was great!  If you give me an address I'll send you the pictures of your friend."

"Why, thank you," Murray said, fishing into his pocket and handing her one of his business cards.

She read it.  "You're private detectives?"

"We are," Murray puffed.

"Wow, that's cool.  Are you going to the dedication?"

Cody nodded.  "That's why we're here – to go with our friend."

"Is Peggy a wife?"

"A friend," Nick corrected.  "A very good friend."

"Cool."  She slipped her camera and the business card into her bag.  "You want to come with me to the dedication site?  I'm going to meet my mom there.  All of the marchers will end up at the site.  You can meet your friend there too."

"That would be great," Cody said with an easy smile.  "Thank you."

"Oh, no problem," she said.  "And I'm Tracy Macelwain."

"Cody Allen, and this is Nick Ryder and Murray Bozinsky."

"You guys vets?" she asked.

They nodded.

"I thought so.  You kind of remind me of my dad."

"Dad?" Cody echoed softly, feeling older still.

Nick reached out and squeezed his best friend's shoulder.  "Is he a vet, too?"

"Yep.  My mom met him when he was in the hospital at DaNang.  He courted her for most of the year he was in-country and they got married a month after they got back to the States.  Come on, the end of the parade is this way."

Murray set out after the girl, but Cody lagged.  "Dad?" he asked Nick.

"Hey, just be glad she didn't say grandpa."

Cody gave him a sour frown.  "Thanks, Nick.  Thanks."

"Any time.  Now, come on, before we lose them in the crowd."

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

The three men followed Tracy as she led the way to the Washington mall.  Men, women and children milled in small groups that descended on the marchers as they arrived.

"Mom!" Tracy yelled.  "Mom, over here!"

The woman walked over to join them, Peggy walking with her.  "Hi, sweetheart," the woman said, giving her daughter a hug.

"Nick, Cody, Murray," Peggy said.  "This is Nancy Macelwain.  We were nurses together."

"And I see you've already met my daughter," Nancy said, shaking hands with the three men.

"She was kind enough to lead the way here," Cody said.

"Trace, why don't you see if you can find your father?  I'll meet you by the Wall.  You know the spot."

"Okay, I'll be right back," she said, jogging off toward a group of men not too far away.

"Peggy, it's so good to see you.  You have my address and phone number, so you'd better stay in touch," Nancy said, giving the women a hug.

"I will," Peggy promised, returning the embrace with heartfelt emotion.  "Thanks."

"Maybe I'll see you at the dedication?"

"Count on it," Peggy said.  "I wouldn't miss that for the world."

Nancy said her goodbyes, then walked down toward the Wall where her husband and daughter waited.

"I'm supposed to meet Jillian Matthews for dinner," Peggy told them.  "Come with me?"

"All of us?" Murray asked.  "I mean–"

Peggy gave him a quick squeeze.  "Yes, Boz, all of you.  I think you'll like Jillian.  She's the nurse who led the veterans group when I first started.  She picked up where you guys left off."

"In that case, we'd be happy to," Cody said.  "Besides, I'm starving."

"Me, too," Nick admitted.  "And we owe this Jillian Matthews a thank you."

Peggy looked embarrassed, but slipped her arm around Nick's and led them off.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

"Jillian," Peggy called, half-standing at their table near the middle of the busy restaurant.

A slightly older women waved and made her way over to join them.  Her salt-and-pepper hair was cut short, and her western-style shirt and jeans suggested that she'd be right at home in the southwest.

"Peggy," she said.  "How're you doing?"

"I'm fine."

"Was the parade wonderful?"

"It was," Peggy said, then gestured to each of the detectives as she said, "Jillian, this is Nick Ryder, Cody Allen and Murray Bozinsky, my friends from King Harbor."

"Gentlemen," she said as they half-stood and she sat.  "Sit, sit, don't let your meals get cold."

The three sat and picked up where they'd left off.

"Aren't you going to eat?" Peggy asked.

"I ate on the flight," Jillian explained.  "And I'm too excited, to tell you the truth."

"I know what you mean," Peggy said, taking another bite.

The foursome laughed, and she paused, then joined in.

Jillian looked to the three men.  "I want to thank you for coming.  I know how much it means to Peggy."

"We were glad to do it," Nick said, smiling at Peggy.

"Can you tell us a little about the memorial?" Cody asked.  "I mean, I didn't really hear anything about it."

Jillian sipped her coffee, then nodded.  "I hear that a lot.  We didn't get the media coverage we wanted, but the money was raised anyway.  Thank God.  Well, let's see… Diane Carlson Evans is the woman who really got this all done.  Diane was a nurse in-country, and when they added the bronze statue of the three infantrymen she got a little, well, pissed off.  There were no women there, no hint that women had even served.  Diane and many of us felt like it was a slap in the face of the 265,000 women who served from August 1964 to January 1973."

"That many?" Murray asked, honestly surprised.  "I never would've guessed it was that many!"

Jillian nodded.  "About 11,000 military and civilian women were actually in Vietnam.  They were nurses, air traffic controllers, postal clerks, dietitians, physical therapists, and civilian volunteers for the Red Cross or the relief agencies, the USO. Eight of those women died, but many, many more were wounded, physically and psychologically."

"That's amazing," Cody said, shaking his head.  "I never had any idea there were so many women in-country with us, but I'll tell you, if it wasn't for the nurses I wouldn't be here now."

"Most people don't know what women did in Vietnam," Peggy said.  "Except other vets; the men we helped save."

"We've been missing from the history books, the medical and psychological studies, the news, speeches, parades, memorials and monuments… until now," Jillian said.  "It's taken ten years, but we're finally going to get the recognition we deserve."

Nick nodded.  "It's long overdue, too, but I'm glad."

 

Until now

 

Unable to sleep, Nick wandered into the living room of the hotel suite they'd booked.  Peggy was sitting on the couch, her feet tucked under her, wiping her eyes with a tissue.

"Peggy," he said softly.  "You all right?"

She nodded silently.

Nick sat down next to her.  "You don't look all right."

She gave him a weak smile.  "I can't really explain it.  I just couldn't sleep…"

"Me either."

"What's keeping you up?" she asked.

Nick shrugged, then admitted.  "I guess it's the memories.  Every time I come here – to the Wall, I mean – I can't keep the ghosts away."

"Friends who died?"

He nodded.  "It makes me wonder… why me?  Why did I make it back?  Why didn't I buy it over there?"

"That's a natural reaction, Nick," she assured quietly.  Reaching out, she held his hand on hers, squeezing his fingers.  "It's called survivor's guilt."

Nick met her concerned gaze.  "I'm okay.  It's just…"

She dipped her head and smiled.  "I know what you mean.  The first time I came to the Wall, five years ago, I just sat there in the grass and cried and cried."  He squeezed her hand.  "Then the strangest thing happened."

"What?"

"Men started coming over to me.  They sat down beside me and they cried with me."  She stopped and wiped her eyes again.  "One of them asked me if I'd lost someone – brother, father.  I told them no, that I had been a nurse…"

"What'd they say?" Nick asked in a hoarse whisper.

"They said…"  She swallowed, cleared her throat, then continued, "They said, 'thank you,'" she whispered.  "Every one of those men gave me a hug and told me about their friends, or their own stories, about nurses who helped them.  They knew.  They understood what I was going through.  They knew how I felt and they made me feel like it was okay…  The same way you did."

Nick pulled her closer and wrapped her in a tight hug.

"They said they wouldn't have made it without me," she continued, resting her head on his shoulder.  "It made me realize that nothing could've trained us for what we had to do there, but we learned.  Somehow we found the strength to go on and do whatever it took, day after day after day.  It made us strong and fragile at the same time.  Now I know that if I could do that, if I could survive that, then I can do anything, survive anything… even the war itself."

Nick nodded against the crown of her head.  "Yeah."

"The war forced me to play God with the lives of those young men, babies, and   I pray every day that I made the right decisions, but now I don't have to wait for an answer that's not coming… not in this life anyway."

"You–  We all did what we had to, and we did it the best we could.  No God would ask for more than that."

She nodded against his chest and he snugged her closer.  Together they held each other in the darkness, each with their own silent prayers.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Nick and Peggy led the way through the crowd.  Nancy, her husband and Jillian followed them, then Cody, Tracy and Murray.  They joined the throng gathered in a garden near the Wall.  Not far away sat the draped sculpture.

After a short wait, a handsome blonde woman in her late-forties or early fifties stepped up to the podium.  "Welcome," she began.  "My name is Lynda, and I was a nurse in Vietnam."  Applause stalled her comments for almost a full minute.  "We meet here today as part of a three day celebration to honor the 265,000 women who served during the Vietnam era, the 11,000 who served in-country, and the eight who gave their lives there.

"Diane Carlson Evans was one of those women who served in-country, and she saw the need to honor the work of women in America's longest war, work that has left many of us changed forever.

"When Diane met Glenna Goodacre, a wonderful and talented sculptor from Santa Fe, New Mexico, a lasting image of our contribution was born.

"Joint Chief of Staff Chairman Colin Powell broke the ground here where this memorial now rests.  He said he did so because he knew first-hand the invaluable contribution we made to the soldiers who fought and died in Vietnam.

"For twenty-one days this statue made its way from New Mexico to Washington DC, stopping in towns and cities across the country.  It was a tour to make visible those invisible women, including myself, who today are receiving their long overdue recognition and thanks for their commitment, their compassion and their sacrifices.

"I welcome Vice-President Al Gore, who will unveil the Vietnam Women's Memorial…"

Gore stood and walked to the draped statue, Secret Service guards shadowing him.  Taking the silk cord in hand, he pulled.  The drape fell away, revealing the 6-foot-8-inch tall bronze statue.  There was a collective intake of breath, then a cheer broke out, accompanied by mad applause.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

In the glow of evening sunlight Peggy stood in front of the statue.  Nick stood with her, studying the faces of the four figures.  The three women wore generic fatigues with no insignia.  They could be women in the Army, Navy, Air Force or Marines.  They could even be civilian women.  But that was the point.  Like the three generic infantrymen who stood forever in the grasp of Vietnam, these women would forever symbolize the contributions of the women who served in that far-off country.

One of the women sat on sandbags, cradling a wounded soldier.  The man's face was partially covered by a bandage over his eyes, rendering him an Everyman, and in his face Nick could see his friends who never made it back to the world.  A second woman looked skyward, waiting, he knew, for the coming chopper – for _him_ to come and save the soldier's life.  The standing woman rested a comforting hand on the shoulder of her companion helping the soldier.  The third woman knelt on the ground nearby, staring at a soldier's helmet, frustration and disbelief carved eternally into her face.

Nick stepped closer to the kneeling woman and then reached out to touch her face.  He wanted to lift her chin and tell her it would be all right, that one day it would all be over, but he couldn't.  It wasn't just that she was made of bronze, it was that he knew it would never really be over, not until the last veteran had died and the war passed forever into the pages of history.  Until then Vietnam would live in the hearts, minds, emotions and memories of everyone who had served there.

Peggy stepped up beside him.

"She's–" he started, but his voice caught as his throat tightened and his eyes filled.

Peggy slipped an arm around Nick's waist and held him close.

"She's the heart…" he managed to say.

Peggy nodded.  "She's the soul of every woman who was there," she agreed in a whisper.  "They all are."

Nick turned and enveloped Peggy in a tight embrace.  Before he realized it, Cody and Murray were there too, wrapping them in a comforting circle of love and acceptance.  And the tears fell in a silent healing…

 

The End


End file.
